Hey, i've got alot to update about.
Well, yeah, i dont have a boyfriend, but im surrounded with all of my friends. And i am proud, that i am carrying myself well. Anyway, yeah, he found someone new.
Yeah, i deleted him from my facebook and contact. I just could not bear how much it hurts to play back the words he said and what is happening now. Well, he doesnt have to lie to me, saying he is single, no doubt, i still contact him. But, when i found out, that he is actually lying, it leads me thinking, why in the world, when he had someone to replace me, he still lie to me and even said that he aint attached. Add on, he accussed me of having a guy. When the fact is, for 5 months, i had been leading my own way.

Yesterday, when i saw his picture with his new love, nurul asked me, 'Kak, knp hubby hug dia??' i answered, 'Hubby dah tk nak ngn kakak lagi. Hubby dah jumper orang baru. Dia dah tak sayang akak and nurul lagi. Nurul takmo cakap sal hubby lagi k...?' and of course, i cried. I hugged her and kissed her. No doubt, i really miss him. That is the only way i could let my feelings out. You know, when you talk to a toddler that knows nothing, it is actually like,you are letting yourself out, but you get no and simple respond.

17 april, i saw the text. 15 april, he spent time with my family. I don't know what he thinks about. And a week ago, he teared. About us. And, ive made my stand, i won't get attached till i really had find my Mr right. The one that could accept my weaknesses and my past. Not worrying much, he won't read this. Will you have a girl to iron your clothes for you for every date out? Put it on for you, adjust you hair. Buy you the facial foam that you use. Get your toiletries ready for your confinement. Do your cabinet, with the fact that you and her are nothing. Seasoned your uniform .Polish your boots. Touch your cheeks and stare hard at you, telling you how much you meant to her. For three years, she kept all the sorrow and all the trouble u've made, just to follow what you said, which is to forgive and forget. Being at her most rugged looks after sports in sweat and still dares to walk to you and hug you in her arm, without thinking how bad she smells. But, urgh, that no longer important, but, will you get a girl that would love you more than i do..??

As long as i am not ready to commit, i won't commit. And once ive start to commit, i want my next to be my last.

AND now, i am concentrating on ivp.
Tired enough.
I hurt my throat during extraction.